I LOVE THE SEVENTH LEVEL OF HELL!

It's official. I'm going to hell with a first class ticket in my hand. None of this compulsive verbal and psychological dancing around that Republicans and CEO's is well known to do.

I'm starting to record VH1's 'I Love the 70's.

I finally unplugged my ass and programmed my VCR to record as batch of those episodes (75 to 79) for next weekend and I'm aiming to get a full collection of this show.

It's not that I fully lived through THAT decade, but I did witness it through my own experience and it wasn't pretty. For example: while everybody was partying during the bicentennial year of 1976, I was stuck in the middle of bondockville of Roy, Utah. Bored out of me head with NOTHING going on.

But then, I was all too young to know that's what mormons do very well, make you life boring and paranoid, usually at the same time..and from their backyard of all of Utah. Pigf*ckers.

Jealous? Sure as hell can't deny it. But I also look back on some pockets of THAT decade and feel glad that I dodged a few of those bullets. Like 'disco': nope, couldn't avoid listening to it, which, in hindsight, wasn't THAT bad, but dressing up for it and dancing in public in, what Zappa called them, "coke-filled smoke rooms"? I dodged just in time.

'Charles Angles'?! I was more of a Mary Tyler Moore person and I will forever associate Cheryl Ladd to 'Josie & The Pussycats'. 'Pop Rocks'?! Big fat hairy deal...I put worse things in my mouth like bad Mexican food. 'Bell Bottoms'?! My sister broke her ankle tripping on those, so screw that mess. 'Bo Derick": healthy, but I couldn't stand her for those beads in her hair. Sorry toots, but that looks better on reggae musicians.

The cynic in me washes in gleeful pride on watching bigger suckers dress all f*cked up and acting like fashion clowns and village idiots (one of the reasons I liked the original Gong Show). Easy laughs when needed...

The flip side is the usual nostalgia wet dreams and all the things I missed, or didn't fully realize at the time. Plus, the armchair cultural professor gets a good education out of this mess. Gotta keep them brain cell from going bad too soon.

VH1 prides itself as being a pop culture channel, though Trio Channel dose better job, only without the wide audience and the current pop culture trend, reality shows. So, you'll have to take VH1 with a grain of salt if you wanna live though this whole pop cultural trappings, old or new.

I'm hoping that when I finally complete my '70's collection through the weeds of VH1, I'll get the first two episodes of 'I Love The 80's (80-81). That should take care of my raging nostalgic binge.

The flag has been hoisted between my butt cheeks...

Hoping I'll come up with something more freakin' contemporary,
Don-O